Yes, File 13 turns now to Wayne, New Jersey, where 35-year old Justin Reese was spotted swerving down the road, this week, so the cops pulled him over.
And since he was slurring his words–and making strange hand movements–officers knew he was ON something, but they weren’t sure what. Until they spotted that bottle in his hand.
Booze? Nope. Drugs? Nope. Over-the-counter MOOD ENHANCEMENT MEDICINE for his CAT?? Check.
Yep, ol’ J-Ree had been chugging on something called “CATNIP COCKTAIL”, which is a drink for cat’s that’s supposed to help them with their ANXIETY. And there’s a big WARNING on it that says it’s NOT safe for PEOPLE.
He’s been charged now with driving while intoxicated and reckless driving…and it’s not clear if he even HAS a cat.
[Editor’s note: Actually, it’s easy to tell when someone’s been drinking Catnip Cocktail–because there are SIGNS. Like these five, that we’ll call “File 13’s Top Five Signs You’ve Been Nippin’ On The Catnip Cocktail”:
#5.You spent the whole weekend–just sitting in the window.
#4. Laser pointers now drive you absolutely crazy.
#3. An empty box on the floor? You’re IN it.
#2. Your reflexes are suddenly…well…cat like.
And File 13’s #1 Sign You’ve Had Too Many “Catnip Cocktails”: You humiliated your entire family at the beach–in the WORST POSSIBLE WAY…(even though you carefully covered it up).
